Relational intelligence, communication and men’s work

Olivier Passebecq

A space to be fully human.

Most of us learn to relate the hard way, one argument at a time. I’d love to offer you another way in.

Hi, I’m Olivier. I support people who want to thrive in their relationships, including the one they have with themselves.

Relating is difficult. There are no classes for it at school, so most of us learn the hard way, and pick up habits that don’t always serve us. We get angry when the person in front of us needs compassion and understanding. We go quiet when they need to understand what’s going on for us.

You can work with me one to one, come for mediation, or join one of the groups, workshops and retreats I run, in London, online and sometimes further afield. Over the years, I came to see how much men need spaces where they can be honest, be heard and hold each other, so a big part of my time and energy goes into the NVC men’s groups I host. When men feel supported, the people around them feel it too.

You’ve probably learned that you should behave a certain way, speak a certain way, think a certain way and feel a certain way. Here, I want to welcome you not as you were taught to be, but exactly as you are, with all your parts and layers: the ones that feel safest to show, and the ones that feel scarier to look at. You are welcome here, in your wholeness and your weirdness.

You might be here because…

Going quiet or blowing up

When conflict comes, you shut down or say more than you meant to. Together we work on staying present and saying what matters without hurting the connection.

Too close, or never close enough

Maybe you need a lot of reassurance and worry the other person will leave. Maybe closeness makes you want to back away. We look at where the pattern comes from and build a steadier, more secure way of relating.

Feeling alone, even with people around

A partner, family, friends, and still few places where you can show your true colours. You want to be heard without judgement, and to feel connection that goes deeper than company. Together we work on finding and building those spaces.

A nervous system out of balance

Wired when you need calm, drained when you need energy. You can feel something is off, and you don’t know what to do with it. In the room with me, your body can begin to settle. From there we listen to what it needs, and you find your own way to meet it.

Unsure whether to stay or go

A relationship that feels difficult, and you’re torn and confused about what to do next. A space without judgement to explore it, so you can find your own answer and make your own choice.

A conflict you can’t resolve alone

A partner, a parent, a friend, a colleague. The same argument, round and round, each of you feeling unheard. Together we rehearse the conversation you need to have, and if you both want it, I can sit with the two of you.

Looking for support for someone you love? You’re welcome to get in touch, and we can find a way in that suits them.