Individual Therapy Sessions
For men who want to feel more at ease in themselves and in their relationships.
I work mostly with men, and everyone is welcome. Together we slow down and listen to what is happening in you, in your body and between you and the people who matter to you. From there, new ways of relating can grow.
At the heart of my work is a human approach: compassion, presence and no judgement. I offer clear structure and guidance, with warmth and a steady presence, meeting you where you are.
In person in North London or online.
What you might come with
- Reacting strongly in conflict and regretting it afterwards, or going quiet and shutting down
- Feeling lonely, even in a relationship that looks fine from the outside
- Patterns in love that keep repeating: chasing, pulling away, or both
- Finding it hard to name what you feel, or to ask for what you need
- Stress, anxiety or a sense of being stuck that thinking it through alone has not shifted
- A big change: a breakup, becoming a father, a loss, a move to a new country
You don’t need to have it all figured out. We start from wherever you are.
"Healing is not the absence of pain, but the presence of wholeness." -Gabor Maté
How I work
My work is rooted in Relational Intelligence (IR), from the French Intelligence Relationnelle: a therapy that works with the nervous system and with attachment.
Many of the ways we react in relationships took shape early in life, as our nervous system learned how to stay safe with the people around us. Those patterns made sense at the time. Later they can show up as overreacting, shutting down or feeling disconnected, even when part of us would like to respond differently.
In our sessions, the relationship between us is part of the work. Through a steady, attuned and non-judgemental presence, your nervous system gets to experience safety in connection, again and again, until it starts to feel more familiar.
I also draw on Internal Family Systems (IFS), which helps us listen to the different parts of you, and on Nonviolent Communication (NVC), which helps you find words for what you feel and need.
What this looks like in practice
My sessions are inclusive. I welcome people from all backgrounds, including LGBTQIA+, and hold a trauma-aware, kink-aware and sex-positive perspective. I don’t work with psychedelics, and I’m glad to support people on that path who are working with other practitioners.
What people say
“We started having sessions during a rough patch of my life, and I immediately felt heard. Olivier is a great listener and he really understands how to create a safe environment, where I felt very comfortable sharing the things that troubled me. The sessions really helped me understand myself better and to see light at the end of the tunnel.”
Marius M, Denmark
“During my sessions with Olivier, I felt an incredible amount of space to truly explore and feel what was present within me. I later noticed a profound sense of integration that I can’t fully explain, but it really shows in the way I feel. I deeply appreciate how carefully Olivier listens to the different parts of me and reformulates what the real Nico might truly want. His care and attention makes all the difference.”
Nico Kars, The Netherlands
Who you’ll work with
I’m Olivier, a somatic and relational therapist trained in IR, and a Nonviolent Communication facilitator. I’ve run an online NVC men’s group for six years, and I now also hold an in-person men’s group in London.
I came to this work through my own search for better ways to connect: first NVC, then IFS and attachment theory, and then IR, which changed how I understand the nervous system and relationships.
My training is in Intelligence Relationnelle® therapy and Nonviolent Communication, listed in full on my About page. I’m not registered with BACP or UKCP.
Two ways to work together
Ongoing sessions
Weekly or fortnightly, for patterns that keep coming back and that need time: the same arguments, going quiet, constantly being ” needy”, tough self critic, feeling alone with what is happening inside.
Over time, change happens in how your body responds as well as in how you communicate.
Focused support
A few sessions around one situation: a conflict that feels stuck, a hard conversation coming up, or a relationship at a turning point.
We get clear on what is happening for you, what you need, and how to deal with it.
Starting
If something here speaks to you, write to me and tell me a little about what’s going on for you. You’re welcome to ask me anything before we arrange a first session.
Sessions happen in person in North London or online. I recommend 1.5 hours for the first session, then 1 hour after that. Fees are on a sliding scale from £70 to £130 per hour, with two free places each month for people facing hardship.
Before our first session, you’re welcome to read my therapeutic framework.
Olivier Passebecq
